Friday, March 04, 2005 1:56 AM
Sigh. . .
Am I selfish? I 0nly care f0r myself, didn't really care f0r the 0thers. Yeah, I really d0 SUX. I didn't care h0w the 0thers feel, as l0ng as I think is 0kie f0r myself.
I dun seem t0 be fit t0 have any cl0se fren 0r being 0thers g00d frens. I have 4 cl0se frens:
1) She did badly f0r her 'O' level, n yet I didn't c0ns0le her. We used t0 g0 0ut 0ften but seld0m 0nce after I had graduated. My heart wanted t0 care f0r her, but I just dunn0 h0w t0. Sigh.
2 & 3) We used t0 be t0gether always last time. W0rk t0gether, chat t0gether. She had pr0blems wif her pr0ject, I can't help much. Cuz I had pr0blem wif mine t00. Sigh. Am I c0unted as a fren?
4) N0t c0unted tat cl0se, but yet is still cl0se. W0rk t0gether, study t0gether, crap t0gether. Sigh. We share pr0blems t0gether s0metimes, th0ugh we can't really s0lve each 0ther pr0blems. N0w tat she had her pr0blems, I 0nly can sit d0wn there d0ing n0thing. I understand her pr0blems, I kn0w I can help but thinking 0f my situati0n, I can't really help. Am I selfish? I'm w0rry, but h0w t0 actually sh0w care and c0ncern? I really dunn0.
Everything's changing. Me t00. 1 day, I hardly can smile anym0re. Enduring my tears these few days. Will this terrible m0nth be 0ver asap? S0 tat every1 will be back t0 n0rmal? I dun wan t0 live in this h0rrible state. I'm 0s0 feeling very sad, smiling ar0und just t0 tell every1 tat I'm alright.
- Silence, Sad Me. Be brave. It's g0nna 0ver. -